Why is it that a baby can inspire such hope in people? Thursday (day 27), a very, very dear friend had her very first baby…a little girl that is absolutely perfect…nothing dark or hopeless about her…just sweet innocence. What a happy, happy day...I had a goofy smile for hours that day!!
But that day was a topsy-turvy kind of day because I also found out that yet another coworker who was just officially hired has cancer that has spread from the original site to another. This lady has gone through a lot and she is working very hard to straighten her life and she is on the verge of breakthrough…and now this. She had volunteered with us...she is not that old at all...sweet smile, sweet disposition...and now this.
Isn’t life a wild ride? It’s really true…it’s like this rollercoaster that thrills and terrifies all at once.
I'm writing this on the morning of Day 29 as I got behind on my posts...and a lot has happened since Thursday (Day 27). Some people at work got together to help set up that new coworker with some things for her new apartment and I pitched in some cash for that. I met with a Pastor of a large church here inSan Antonio
Friday (Day 28) was a very busy day for me although it began with taking care of my oldest that has another cold. I worked and got frustrated and calmed down...but also had the opportunity to laugh with some coworkers on our way to a welcome lunch for some new employees. You see, there is construction work being done on the main road that gets us to and from work...and we were late...and between the tractors and orange cones and overly-careful people (is that even possible?), the driver was getting seven shades of excited as we just couldn't seem to get ahead. Then a light blue minivan that was being driven by an elderly man came into our lives for a moment. My coworker that was driving, although late, allowed this man to turn right and get in front of us. The light for us was green, we could have sped on...but we waited for this man...who decided to stop half-way on his turn...why? Who knows why... But our driver and the front passenger started yelling at him to "GO!!!! GO!!!" with lots of waving arms. Kinda makes me laugh again now that I'm typing it. So the man carefully starts in again and - probably panicked by the display of exaggerated gestures to "GO!!!!!" - he got in the far left lane...which was a turn-left only lane...and guess what? Both our cars got stuck at the now red light. So there we are, next to each other although our car was slightly behind...and then the blue van's passenger window starts to roll down and we see a hand coming out and we all start laughing thinking the old woman whose hand it was was going to shoot us the bird if you know what I mean...but instead, the hand waves us forward. We all thought she was going to say something derogatory...but instead...she asked for our help again as they wanted to know if we would allow them to get in front of us as they were in the wrong lane. The driver of our car agreed but if only they could move in front quickly. The light turned green...they got in front of us - slowly - to another great display of "GO - GO - GO!!!!!" and onwards we went. The road turned into two lanes and we quickly zoomed by them and watched as the poor man cut off another driver as he changed lanes. We laughed and talked about the driver hoping he made it to his destination safely...and the driver of our car said, "you should see Annie's face!" I think I was just incredulous to it all...and highly amused by my car-mates...and isn't that the perfect parody of "real life?"
We all have this place we have to get to...and chances are we're late because we started our journey late - we took detours or weren't paying attention to the directions or whatever the case may be...but we're late. And then these boneheads get in our way...sometimes because we let them...and sometimes because they just impose themselves on us...and we get frustrated and yell and carry on and blame them for making us even more late. We finally get around them and think we're on our way...but we encounter red lights, construction, and unforeseen weather conditions...and what do we do? Become more agitated, frustrated, annoyed? I know I have! And that is how life goes - in bits and pieces, with lots of stops, and unforeseen circumstances popping up - but always within us is the urge to press forward so we can get where we need to go - wherever that may be.
But we really do miss the joy and beauty of the trip when we rush...and I think we all know that to be true. So we're late - and? What will happen if we arrive a little late? We will still breathe, we will still eat, we will survive - I have no doubt.
The bottom line is that life truly, verily, is precious...and oftentimes it is so easy to let that fact escape us. We get busy doing, doing, doing; we get busy doing things that bring us pleasure in a selfish way; we do things to "get us ahead" in our jobs; we do things without even thinking about the harm they bring to us - things like smoking, drinking, overeating, holding on to grudges and past hurts...we do things that in fact hurt others because we feel justified in doing so...and to what end? Do those things help or hinder our journey?
Part of mindful/thoughtful living is not only finding ways to bring the Christmas spirit to others in terms of doing things for them to fill their love-cups...but also having the discipline and understanding to know when it is best not to do or say something to someone...or "at" someone.
I get frustrated with my children...with my husband...with people in general. Like that old man in the blue van - they are seemingly oblivious to the level of angst they are sowing around them - and I sit in awe and self-righteous condemnation of them..."HOW DARE THEY BE THIS CLUELESS??!!" I think inside my mind. And oh how I long to say something to them - to correct them, to point out their idiocy - to make them understand how crazy they are driving me...as though I was a perfect princess incapable of being the cause of any angst around myself (well - of course I don't cause angst! I'm perfect?! Isn't that what we think about ourselves?!) In the past I would have allowed myself the "pleasure" of correcting people...tone dripping with sarcasm, face reflecting appropriate amount of disgust...I would have put people "in their place"...but now I think - "what's the point?" I sometimes fail in this mission but more and more I try really, really hard not to go there.
There is a difference between bringing light and bringing darkness to people. And why would we want to be the harbinger of darkness, of tearing down instead of building up? Because it brings us momentary pleasure? Because we are "right" and the other is "wrong?" And are the ripples we set in motion worth it? Remember - we never truly know where a person is emotionally as you can never adequately judge a book by its cover. Wouldn't it be interesting to know all the hurts our words and actions have caused? I don't think it would be pleasant but I honestly believe it would be eye opening enough that it would inspire us to change the words and actions we use and how we use them.
I pray we all become more patient with each other...more mindful of ourselves and the ripples we set in motion...and that we ask ourselves whether the momentary pleasure and satisfaction we get from "correcting" someone is worth the price the other person may pay. Remember the grade school admonition: if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all? I don't think I agree with that whole-heartedly in that sometimes things need to be said that are not pleasant but they must be said to bring healing or correction to a situation. I think the trick, though, is finding a way to say those things out of love and not frustrated disgust.
Today I have set some Christmas goals...chief among them is to bring some Christmas cheer to my next door neighbors - the grumpy, 80-year-old ones. I'll let you know how that goes.
To my funny, sweet coworkers that made me laugh so...thank you! For so many things - thank you!
Until tomorrow... Annie
But that day was a topsy-turvy kind of day because I also found out that yet another coworker who was just officially hired has cancer that has spread from the original site to another. This lady has gone through a lot and she is working very hard to straighten her life and she is on the verge of breakthrough…and now this. She had volunteered with us...she is not that old at all...sweet smile, sweet disposition...and now this.
Isn’t life a wild ride? It’s really true…it’s like this rollercoaster that thrills and terrifies all at once.
I'm writing this on the morning of Day 29 as I got behind on my posts...and a lot has happened since Thursday (Day 27). Some people at work got together to help set up that new coworker with some things for her new apartment and I pitched in some cash for that. I met with a Pastor of a large church here in
Friday (Day 28) was a very busy day for me although it began with taking care of my oldest that has another cold. I worked and got frustrated and calmed down...but also had the opportunity to laugh with some coworkers on our way to a welcome lunch for some new employees. You see, there is construction work being done on the main road that gets us to and from work...and we were late...and between the tractors and orange cones and overly-careful people (is that even possible?), the driver was getting seven shades of excited as we just couldn't seem to get ahead. Then a light blue minivan that was being driven by an elderly man came into our lives for a moment. My coworker that was driving, although late, allowed this man to turn right and get in front of us. The light for us was green, we could have sped on...but we waited for this man...who decided to stop half-way on his turn...why? Who knows why... But our driver and the front passenger started yelling at him to "GO!!!! GO!!!" with lots of waving arms. Kinda makes me laugh again now that I'm typing it. So the man carefully starts in again and - probably panicked by the display of exaggerated gestures to "GO!!!!!" - he got in the far left lane...which was a turn-left only lane...and guess what? Both our cars got stuck at the now red light. So there we are, next to each other although our car was slightly behind...and then the blue van's passenger window starts to roll down and we see a hand coming out and we all start laughing thinking the old woman whose hand it was was going to shoot us the bird if you know what I mean...but instead, the hand waves us forward. We all thought she was going to say something derogatory...but instead...she asked for our help again as they wanted to know if we would allow them to get in front of us as they were in the wrong lane. The driver of our car agreed but if only they could move in front quickly. The light turned green...they got in front of us - slowly - to another great display of "GO - GO - GO!!!!!" and onwards we went. The road turned into two lanes and we quickly zoomed by them and watched as the poor man cut off another driver as he changed lanes. We laughed and talked about the driver hoping he made it to his destination safely...and the driver of our car said, "you should see Annie's face!" I think I was just incredulous to it all...and highly amused by my car-mates...and isn't that the perfect parody of "real life?"
We all have this place we have to get to...and chances are we're late because we started our journey late - we took detours or weren't paying attention to the directions or whatever the case may be...but we're late. And then these boneheads get in our way...sometimes because we let them...and sometimes because they just impose themselves on us...and we get frustrated and yell and carry on and blame them for making us even more late. We finally get around them and think we're on our way...but we encounter red lights, construction, and unforeseen weather conditions...and what do we do? Become more agitated, frustrated, annoyed? I know I have! And that is how life goes - in bits and pieces, with lots of stops, and unforeseen circumstances popping up - but always within us is the urge to press forward so we can get where we need to go - wherever that may be.
But we really do miss the joy and beauty of the trip when we rush...and I think we all know that to be true. So we're late - and? What will happen if we arrive a little late? We will still breathe, we will still eat, we will survive - I have no doubt.
The bottom line is that life truly, verily, is precious...and oftentimes it is so easy to let that fact escape us. We get busy doing, doing, doing; we get busy doing things that bring us pleasure in a selfish way; we do things to "get us ahead" in our jobs; we do things without even thinking about the harm they bring to us - things like smoking, drinking, overeating, holding on to grudges and past hurts...we do things that in fact hurt others because we feel justified in doing so...and to what end? Do those things help or hinder our journey?
Part of mindful/thoughtful living is not only finding ways to bring the Christmas spirit to others in terms of doing things for them to fill their love-cups...but also having the discipline and understanding to know when it is best not to do or say something to someone...or "at" someone.
I get frustrated with my children...with my husband...with people in general. Like that old man in the blue van - they are seemingly oblivious to the level of angst they are sowing around them - and I sit in awe and self-righteous condemnation of them..."HOW DARE THEY BE THIS CLUELESS??!!" I think inside my mind. And oh how I long to say something to them - to correct them, to point out their idiocy - to make them understand how crazy they are driving me...as though I was a perfect princess incapable of being the cause of any angst around myself (well - of course I don't cause angst! I'm perfect?! Isn't that what we think about ourselves?!) In the past I would have allowed myself the "pleasure" of correcting people...tone dripping with sarcasm, face reflecting appropriate amount of disgust...I would have put people "in their place"...but now I think - "what's the point?" I sometimes fail in this mission but more and more I try really, really hard not to go there.
There is a difference between bringing light and bringing darkness to people. And why would we want to be the harbinger of darkness, of tearing down instead of building up? Because it brings us momentary pleasure? Because we are "right" and the other is "wrong?" And are the ripples we set in motion worth it? Remember - we never truly know where a person is emotionally as you can never adequately judge a book by its cover. Wouldn't it be interesting to know all the hurts our words and actions have caused? I don't think it would be pleasant but I honestly believe it would be eye opening enough that it would inspire us to change the words and actions we use and how we use them.
I pray we all become more patient with each other...more mindful of ourselves and the ripples we set in motion...and that we ask ourselves whether the momentary pleasure and satisfaction we get from "correcting" someone is worth the price the other person may pay. Remember the grade school admonition: if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all? I don't think I agree with that whole-heartedly in that sometimes things need to be said that are not pleasant but they must be said to bring healing or correction to a situation. I think the trick, though, is finding a way to say those things out of love and not frustrated disgust.
Today I have set some Christmas goals...chief among them is to bring some Christmas cheer to my next door neighbors - the grumpy, 80-year-old ones. I'll let you know how that goes.
To my funny, sweet coworkers that made me laugh so...thank you! For so many things - thank you!
Until tomorrow... Annie
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